Saturday, December 1, 2012

Accomplishments & Goals pt 2

Today is December 1, 2012 and it's 11:55 p.m. Wow, it's been almost a whole year since I've written a blog post. I want to first start off by saying that I am truly thankful to the Lord for keeping for the whole year of 2012. I have to say that 2012 has been a wonderful but yet challenging year for me. I have lost family members, RIP Daddy aka Grandfather (James Jackson) and Granny Chris. I've had all kinds of sicknesses and many other challenges in my life. However, I'm thankful to the Lord Jesus Christ that I am still here. Hallelujah! Thank You Lord Jesus! Even though I've faced challenges, I have to honestly say that this year has been such a great year. The Bible tells us to write the vision and make it plain which is one reason why I have decided to create this blog.

In 2011, I posted a blog called Accomplishments & Goals and wrote a list of 13 things that I would like to see accomplished for the year of 2011.

These are the following goals I have set for myself in 2011:

1. Spend more time with God
2. Find Me A Job in my Field
3. Start my own Business
4. Create an Website
5. Get my Business License and Tax ID
6. Get back into College
7. Finish Writing all the books I have started
8. Publish the Power in Prayer of Faith
9. Get a Make Over
10. Lose Weight and get in shape
11. Move out of my parents house
12. Get my drivers license
13. Go to the Army

The goal #1 was to spend more time with God is something that I am constantly striving for. I did find myself spending more time reading the Word of God, praying, and talking with God. However, at one point I fell off and started slacking because of the many challenges that I have had to face. I lost some friends, fell into some old sinful habits, got sick on several occasions. Some new things happened in our household. Lot's of other things happened. With that in mind, instead of asking to spend more time with God my prayer is that God help me to be more diligent and committed to spending time with God, serving God, and loving God. Lord help me to do better please. :)

The goal #2 was to find me a job in my field. The reason this has not come to pass is because I have not been looking. For school, I will have to do an Practicum and two internships which will take up most of my time. If I were to find a job right now I would have to quit the job in about a year or so to focus on the Internship and I really did not want to go through with that. Hopefully and prayerfully I can have an paid Internship.

The goal #3 was to start my own business and I am thankful to God for blessing me to start my business called Shamonj Gifts LLC.

The goal #4 was to create an website. I am thankful to God for my web designer Anthony helping me to design for Shamonj Gifts LLC. He originally helped me to create it in 2005 but he didn't start creating it until 2010. However, I changed the look of it in 2011.

The goal #5 was to Get my Business License and Tax ID. This goal should have been attached to goal #3. Shamonj Gifts LLC is an licensed company in the state of Michigan and I have my tax ID. The business is classified as a publisher. Eventually I would like to build a team to work for my company and pay them. I would like to be able to hire someone to be on the executive board, managers, supervisors, employees, etc.......

The goal #6 was to Get back into College. I am thankful to the Lord that I am enrolled at Walden University working towards my second Master's in Science of Mental Health Counseling. So far I have 2 more classes, 1 practicum and 2 internships to go and then I will be finished. I can't wait until I graduate! I would love to go back to school and get my PHD or Doctorate Degree. I haven't decided which major I would get for that higher level of education yet.

The goal #7 is to Finish Writing all the books I have started but I have not finished them. However, this is something I am currently working on.

The goal #8 was to Publish the Power in Prayer of Faith but I didn't publish it at all because I need someone to edit it for me. Recently I have been editing the book myself and will send it to my editor to edit it. I also changed the name of the book to the Power to Make A Difference. In the future I will also create an scholarship fund called The Power to Make A Difference Foundation. A scholarship will be given to people who are making a difference in their community to three people who qualify every year. Even though I didn't publish The Power to Make A Difference Foundation, I did publish 2 books. One is called The Only One I Love and the other is called My Vision Journal. The Only One I Love is published in both the English and French language on the kindle and in paperback. Special thanks to John Biao for translating my English book from English to French.
The goal #9 was to Get a Make Over. I just started this new business and I haven't put an effort into getting an make over. This will have to be something that I will have to do next year.
The goal #10 was Lose Weight and get in shape. One day when I was watching Dr. Oz on TV, I saw these women who were between 500 and 700 pounds. I had tears in my eyes seeing them and realized that I didn't want to be like that. So I started to watch what I ate. For a minute I was training my body. However, I became discouraged and stopped. I got back into old habits and even gained some weight. I plan to work harder and lose the weight so I can get in great shape. The Bible says lay aside every weight and sin that so easily beset you. So by faith I am laying this weight down in Jesus name! God will help me!
The goal #11 was to Move out of my parents house. I didn't get the opportunity to move out because I am not financially stable to do that right now. However, this is a goal that I will definitely continue to work towards.
The goal #12 was to Get my drivers license. This is another goal that I did not accomplish unfortunately. However, I did manage to get my permit. My goal is to take drivers training and then get my license and save money so I can get me a car. I need to be able to get around on my own!
The goal #13 was to Go to the Army. I changed my mind about going to the army because I don't really like the idea of the government owning me. Another reason is because I don't feel that I am healthy enough for it.

 Ok here are the new set of goals.

1. To become more connected to Christ Jesus, develop a better relationship with him, hear is voice daily, and stay diligent and 100% committed to Christ Jesus.

2. To become more skilled in the Bible and the Word of God, pray and minister to people.

3. To lose weight, get in shape, and get an makeover from the inside out.

4. To fall in love with and get in a relationship with a God fearing and Holy Ghost filled, loving, kind and honest Elite man that God has for me.

5. To get my drivers license and get myself a car.

6. To graduate from Walden University with my Master's Degree in Mental Health Counseling and become an Licensed Mental Health Counselor.

7. To get a job in the Counseling field.

8. To publish 3 books and 1 journal. The name of the books are The Power to Make A Difference, The Meek Russell Story, 100 Reasons Singles Should Keep Their Legs Closed.

9. To start a scholarship fund called The Power to Make A Difference and give out 3 scholarships in 2014.

10. To become more organized and neat!

11. To make lot's of money!

12. To finish writing all the books that I started and never finished.

13. To read many of the books that I have purchased and apply them to my life and my business.

14. To get my own place and move out of my mom's place.

15. To find a church home.

16. To design more graphics and help others to get their book published.

17. To become an certified Belief Therapist.

18. To develop new friendships and become closer to the friends that I already have and reconnect with good old friends.

19. To do speaking engagements at churches, schools, etc........

20. To do more shopping and get all the things I need and desire.

21. To become a better Shawne!

22. To continue to work on and add to my website.

23. To have good success at everything I touch!

24. To become an best selling author!

25. To have more peace and joy in my life.

26. To be free and have more fun!

27. To create more business partners and network with more people in the fields of Counseling, publishing, writing, graphic design and other occupations.

28. To get my passport and travel everywhere.

29. To do book signings and book release parties.

30. To go to different business meetings, conferences, etc.....

31. Join counseling, graphic design, and writing organizations.

32. Invest in stocks and bonds.

33. Create a Business bank Account.

34. To get a business mentor.

35. To forgive others and restore broken relationships with family and to eliminate all negative people from my life.

36. To publish more books on the Kindle and paper back.

37. To take a cruise.

38. To brand and succeed in my business.

I confess in Jesus name that God will do all of these things. The Bible says write the vision and make it plain so I have did just that! I am trusting God to help me to bring these things to pass.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

The Only One I Love

A Story that will inspire you as well as have you feeling the emotions of the character!

Hello everyone, how are you all doing? Good I hope. It is July 19, 2011 and it's 1:48 p.m. eastern time.  I know that it has been a few months since I have written on this blog. I must say that a lot has been going on as of lately. Today I want to write a blog called The Only One I Love.

 As a little girl, many of us have our own perceptions about what we think love is. Often times these perceptions are given to us from our parents, the music we listen to, the movies, cartoons, and TV shows that we watch. Then as we grow up and gain more experiences, we get our perception of love from other sources as well. We can be influenced by our environment, the people we hang around, and our experiences. Life sometimes teaches us lessons that we prefer not to learn when it comes to loving someone.

I had one lady in church tell me one time baby you are too young to be settling down with one person. I often times asked why would she say this? At the time I was in high school when she told me that. I often wondered what happened to people pursuing the one person that they love. Isn't dating a whole bunch of people at the same time creating a future male or woman cheater? How could a man take a woman seriously if she is dating a bunch of men? Some people have also told me not to put all your eggs in one basket. Why not find that one person and give all my love to that one person? Why not take the risk of loving someone? Why not allow the goodness in me to shed a light in that person's heart? Why not show that I am a great woman worthy of marriage, love, and respect?

Often times when little girls grow up they experience things like a man lying to them, cheating on them, sexually abusing them, hurting them, verbally abusing them, ignoring them, rejecting them, etc.... Often times these women experiences betrayal from family members, friends, boyfriends, and other people they allow in their heart. The question is, how does a person heal from a combination of hurt and pain. What if the person do not trust people enough to reach out? What should a person do to become healed from their past? Sometimes it takes one person to come into your life and show you that they are genuine and actively seeking you out. Sometimes it takes someone to look you in the eye and say "You're the only one I love." Note that your actions have to line up with the words that you have spoken. Show love to that person and that person can heal. Love is the thing that can heal a person. By showing in words and deeds that you are the only one that he loves can make a world of difference in her life. Love changes things, people, and circumstances. The story called the Only One I Love is a story that I first wrote when I was in high school. Recently I decided to go through my old writings and improve them. I improved the story to reflect the different things that people who are single and in relationships experience. It's a story about life that will have you on the edge of your seat wondering what will happen. Check out the video trailer!

You can purchase the ebook on Shamonj's Website, Shamonj's Facebook Fanpage,, and by clicking on the links below!
Click here to purchase The Only One I Love on Shamonj's Website! 

Click here to Like Shamonj's Fanpage & to purchase The Only One I Love!

Click here to purchase The Only One I Love on YouPublish!

Click here to purchase The Only One I Love on the Kindle through Amazon!

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Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Writing History

Hello everyone. It's February 8, 2011 and 3:17 p.m. Today I'm still examining my life and the lives of those who I'm proud of. As I began to think about my life I have some things to be proud of. I'm proud of my ancestors. I'm proud of the things that many African American people sacrificed so that we can have a better life. I'm proud of traditional and contemporary heros.

I decided to create an poster in honor of the black people whom I am proud of. I'm proud of many people. In the picture, 99.9% of the photos are in black and white. The reason why those photos are in black and white is because all those people have accomplished great things in life. The only picture that isn't in black and white is the picture of myself. You may ask why isn't the picture of yourself in black and white? Are you boastful or arrogant? Do you think you are better than the rest of the people? The answer to all these questions is no. I don't think I'm better than anyone. The reason why the photo of myself is in color is because I haven't accomplished much. This is the season of my life where I need to get up and get some great things accomplished. I'm ready to walk in the calling that God has on my life. Though I have not accomplished as much stuff as the one's in the black and white photo I'm ready to get started accomplishing things so that I can began writing my history. I want to be written about because of great things I've accomplished. Whether it be because I impacted someone's life through counseling, writing, singing, graphic design, giving, helping, or just by reflecting Christ's love into other peoples lives.

There are many people I'm proud of. The people in this photo I've never really had the opportunity to meet them except for Ty Adams. I have met her and she's an awesome woman of God. Some of these people are dead and gone while others are alive. The ones that are alive I pray that God blesses me to be able to meet them. I also pray that they see this blog and have a smile upon their faces and feel honored. We should give honor where honor is due.

I'm proud of what Martin Luther King Jr did, in being brave enough to stand up for what he believed in. He stood up for freedom, equality, and justice. I'm proud of Madam CJ Walker who invented the pressing comb. I'm proud of Harriet Tubman who sacrificed her own life to abolish slavery. She was the Moses of her days and she loved God as well. I'm proud of Rosa Parks for standing up for what she believed in. She felt that she is just as good as other people and should be able to sit in the front of the bus. She felt that she shouldn't have to move just because someone had white skin. I'm proud of Bishop Butler for being an great example of faithful and serving many years as Pastor of Word of Faith International Christian Center. I'm also proud of the fact that he teaches the Word of God with power and has been a great example in the body of Christ. I'm proud of Stevie Wonder for not allowing the fact that he was blind to stop him from singing. Stevie Wonder is one of the greatest artists today. I'm proud of Cece Winans for being an example of what a true black woman of God should be. I'm proud of the fact that she sings for the Lord and the Lord only. I'm proud of the fact that Nat King Cole is one of the greatest love song singers. The majority of his music is good clean love songs and I admire him for that. I'm proud of Langston Hughes because He was a very talented black poet and famous for a poem entitled "A Dream Deferred". I'm proud of Maya Angelou because she was a very talented black poet who was famous for poems called "Still I Rise and Phenomenal Woman." I'm proud of Oprah Winfrey for being one of the most successful black women in America, starting her own talk show and later starting her OWN which is her own network on television. I'm also proud of the fact that Oprah is a giver and doesn't overlook the poor. I'm proud of Tyler Perry because his story really inspires me. Tyler Perry went through a lot of pain in his life. He was molested and became homeless. He went from rags to riches. I'm proud of all the things that he has accomplished and even while still serving Christ. I'm proud of the fact that Tyler Perry gives other Black people a chance who society or Hollywood may have neglected. Tyler Perry is a great example of how you can live if you trust God. I am also proud of the fact that Tyler Perry has his own Studio as a black man and don't have to go through Hollywood to come up with films. I'm proud of President Obama for being our first black president. Obama being president let's me know that I have no excuses. If Obama can become president I can accomplish everything that I desire to do in life. I'm proud that Obama is standing for change and is trying to create jobs for those that don't have them. I'm proud of Ty Adams for preaching the Word of God and changing the lives of young women in this world and teaching them how to sustain from sexual desires as a single woman. America has come a long way. There was a time that black people were not even able to read books. Now there are black people writing book. That means a lot. Ty Adams, Tyler Perry, Oprah Winfrey, Bishop Butler have all accomplished something that I desire to accomplish and that is write and publish books and create films that will impact the nation and change lives.

I'm proud of myself as well. Yes I am. I'm proud of the beautiful and intelligent woman I have become. I don't say that boastfully but I say it because I know who I am in Christ. I am a new creature in Christ. I'm proud of the fact that I am a woman who has an Associates Degree in Business, Bachelor's Degree in Graphic Communications, and Master's Degree in Psychology. I'm proud of the fact that I'm a black woman. When others have put me down and talked bad about me, God didn't give up on me.

One thing that I have in common with all of these people in this photo is the fact that we are all black and have or had a specific purpose or calling on our lives. I'm proud of every person who is on this picture and it does my heart good to see that they are walking in their purpose. I too want to walk in my purpose. Some of these people have written their history (Maya Angelou, Martin Luther King Jr, Rosa Parks, Harriet Tubman, Nat King Cole, Madam CJ Walker and many others not in this photo). While there are some people in this photo who are in the process of writing their history (Bishop Keith A. Butler, President Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Cece Winans, Stevie Wonders, Ty Adams, and myself (Shawne Jackson) and others who are not in this photo).

The people in this photo are black men and women who have written their history or writing their history. My name is Shawne Jackson, I'm a black woman and I'm writing History.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Accomplishments & Goals

Today is Saturday, February 5, 2011 and 9:25 a.m. I want to start off by saying thank you God for waking me up this morning. The Lord is truly good I must say. He allowed me to live another day. I must say that I am truly blessed. So how are you all doing? Good I hope.

Yesterday my mind began to reflect back over my life. Throughout the years I have accomplished many things that many in my family have not accomplished. I am the first person among my cousins on both sides of the family to get an Associates Degree, Bachelor's Degree, and Master's Degree. My Associates Degree is in Business, My Bachelor's Degree is in Graphic Communications, and my Master's Degree is in Psychology. In December of 2010, I graduated with my Master's Degree in Psychology. I am the Trendsetter in my family. I've always been the unique or the different one. I believe that God has set me aside for His own use. I am looking forward to God working things out on my behalf. I'm the only one in my family who sings, writer, and do Graphic Design.

I've noticed in many cases that sometimes families as a whole are called by God to do different things. For an example, the Winans are called to Minister the Word of God through song. Bishop Butler, his wife, and children are all called to be Pastors, Leaders, Ministers. I often wonder what is it that my family is called to do? It's really difficult to tell because the majority of my family all do different things.

For now, I am called to be an student until God tells me otherwise. I've just enrolled at Walden University to get my Master's Degree in Counseling. The reason why is simply because God placed a strong desire in my heart to help and assist other people. I wanted to go on and get my PHD in counseling. However, I couldn't because they said I would have to have an Master's Degree in Counseling. So my plans is to go back to school, get my Master's in Mental Health Counseling and then get my PHD. Then I would like to go back to school and get my Degree in Christian Counseling and Theology.

Outside of school, I have accomplished some things. I created the ShamonjTV1 online show. I've manage to find my identity online and created several fanpages. Online I am known as Shamonj. I've gotten started on writing some books. I completed a book called The Power in Prayer of Faith. I've started conducting research to find out exactly what love is. Love is the greatest force in this world. I have started writing another book called Captured Image: How Do You See Yourself?

It's 2011 and a New Year. I'm ready to make some changes in my life. These are my goals for this year.

1. Spend more time with God
2. Find Me A Job in my Field
3. Start my own Business
4. Create an Website
5. Get my Business License and Tax ID
6. Get back into College
7. Finish Writing all the books I have started
8. Publish the Power in Prayer of Faith
9. Get a Make Over
10. Lose Weight and get in shape
11. Move out of my parents house
12. Get my drivers license
13. Go to the Army

These are 13 things that I would like to accomplish this year. I am praying that God help me to do these things as I put forth the effort. I am Shamonj, the Trendsetter. I am ready to tackle all of these goals one at a time. I thank God in advance for helping me to tackle every goal. Hallelujah! Thank you Lord Jesus.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Calling of God

Hello everyone, how are you all doing? Good I hope. I am doing good. It's 11:48 p.m. and the date is 09/01/10. Can you guys believe it? It's the first day of September and we are still getting hot weather. Being in that hot weather made me realize that I wouldn't last any seconds in hell. I live in a house with no air conditioner but it's all good because God is good no matter what we go through. I'm still thanking God for the future.

Today, Earl and I went to the library. I had to take back some movies that I rented from them. The movies are called It's Complicated, Coming to America, and The Secrets of Jonathan Sperry. I highly suggest that every Christian go and buy the Secrets of Jonathan Sperry on DVD. Thanks Jonathan Parnell for suggesting that movie to me. It's an awesome movie that gives you a strategy on how to share your faith with children in particular. You bribe them with chocolate cake, lol. Naw, I'm just kidding! We stayed at the library until they put us out literally. I like going to the library because the atmosphere is comfortable and its nice and cool there. I don't have to worry about sweating because they have central air. At the library we used the computer and talked to a friend of ours by the name of Michael. We had a wonderful conversation about the Lord and life.

After the library was closed, we started walking. A few weeks ago I was having trouble with my back hurting when I was walking but I thank God that I didn't have trouble at that time. God had answered my prayer. I know that I was too young to be hurting like this in my back. I had to continue to pray and ask the Lord to help me daily. Thank you Jesus! Hallelujah!

Michael lived the same way we were walking so he walked with us. He revealed to us that God has called him to be a prophet and that he has found a church home. He preaches and teaches the Word of God at his church. I could see that he is at peace with his calling and knowing what God has designed him to do. As time went by, the Spirit of the Lord began to speak to him concerning me. He said that I am called to be an Evangelist and to preach the Word. He also said that I would lay hands on the sick and they would get delivered. I was like wow, that is crazy. So my first reaction was laughter. My friend Earl looked at him and could bare witness with Michael's spirit. It's like he knew that Michael had heard from the Lord. Guys I am trying to explain this the best way that I can. Earl began to speak about fire as well. It made me think of the scripture that says that God is a consuming fire. It also brought back memories of being at my friend Sherry's apartment. One time I was at her apartment, and it was extremely hot to me. I remember that Andrea, Sherry, her daughter and myself was there. Sherry's place had central air but yet I was still extremely hot. I began to take off my pants. My friend was like don't be stripping in here. I wasn't trying to but I was hot. I thought for a minute that I was having hot flashes. The next day, Sherry told me that she saw a fire next to me in the Spirit. Immediately I thought about the Holy Ghost fire and I also thought about the scripture that says that God is a consuming fire. I'm guessing that God's presence was all over that room.

I guess you guys may be wondering why did I laugh. To be honest, I can't even explain it. I guess the reason I laughed was because it was something that God had spoken to me through other people in the past. At that moment, God began to bring back those things that happened leading up to me knowing my calling.

A few years ago when I was in Flint, I went to Abundant Life Ministries International Church. The Pastor there told the congregation openly that they should be like me because I invited a lot of people to church and I don't even have a car. It's true every Sunday I used to invite people to church. He looked at me and said "I knew you had some evangelism in you."

My mother used to always call me Evangelist Shawne. I used to laugh at her because I thought she was crazy for telling me that. But what I didn't know is that there was truth in what she said.

Then I had a friend tell me that I have a Spirit of an Evangelist when I was in Flint.

One day I was in prayer and seeking the Lord and I heard His voice clear as day "Evangelist Shawne." It couldn't have been anyone but the Lord because all my roommates were gone. I was there that day reading my Bible and praying to the Lord.

Years later, after I left the Baker College in Flint, I began to have dreams. I had two dreams. In both dreams I was in a white suit. In one dream I was singing and in the other dream I was preaching the Word of God and giving my testimony. Thousands of people was in that place and was delivered.

I also had another dream. In this dream, I was on a boat and the boat was sinking. Somehow God delivered me from that situation. I think that he gave me small boat to get off the big boat. The next thing I know in the dream, I was in a car with my friend Jessica. She drove me to this hospital and left me there. I'm thinking that it was a mental hospital but I'm not totally sure. There was this demonic cult in the back room putting spells on people by the laying of the hands and preaching false doctrine. The lady at the front desk warned me telling me not to go back there or they will put a spell on me. I didn't listen to her but I walked to the back where they were having an cult service similar to church. The next thing I know, this guy tried to lay hands on me. He laid hands on me and nothing happened to me. All of a Sudden the Spirit of God moved and I began to preach the gospel. Preaching that Jesus is Lord, and He used me to lay hands on people rebuking the evil spirits in Jesus name. The demons were cast out of the people and they received Christ as Lord. People were on the floor weeping and repenting for their sins. That was truly an amazing dream.

While Earl, Michael, and myself were walking I began to share some things with them. I didn't share all of my experiences that I am writing in this blog. I did tell them that it is my heart's desire to do ministry at my home. When I get my own house, I desire for all kinds of people to come over to pray with me and to hear the Word of the Lord. I'd very much like to minister to other people. For a while I was so confused about the calling that God had for me. I even doubted it after an experience at this church I used to attend. I was told before by an Pastor that I shouldn't do YouTube Videos of me preaching because it is inappropriate because I am not ordained by him to preach. He said what I was preaching was the right doctrine but it was out of order. He also told me not to preach in the name of the church. So for a while, I stopped preaching period. I felt hurt in my heart because after all that happened, I was denied the one thing I liked to do and that was to minister to other people. For a long time I thought that I was not called by God. So I stopped doing videos, I stopped writing sermons, and I stopped ministering to other people because of what I was told. I didn't want to be doing something that God had not called me to do.

One day, I got an phone call from an man of God by the name of Prophet Brian. He told me that I am called to be an Evangelist. I also had another man of God tell me that I am called to preach the Word of God.

It's like I keep getting the same prophetic word over and over again. I honestly feel that I am not worthy to preach to nobody. I have my own issues and struggles that I really need to deal with. I have a lot of hurt in my heart that I need God's help with. I need for God to help me to release the things that has been piercing my heart. I struggle on the day to day basis to live a life to please God. I don't want to have to struggle to please God. I want pleasing God to come naturally for me. I desire for God to give me infinite wisdom so that I can make all the right choices for my life by His Spirit.

Truth be told most normal people do not have dreams like that. I never thought in a million years that God would call me to do this. Now that I have been given this information over and over again by different people what do I do with it now? Sometimes I don't feel worthy to be called by God. Sometimes I feel as if I can't do this. Sometimes I don't want to be called by God to do this because I'm afraid of failing God. Every time I have failed God I used to cry, sometimes for days. Now I know that God has forgiven me. Sometimes I have a difficult time forgiving myself for the things that I do.

Guys, I have to keep it real. I haven't been to church in a while for different reasons. Sometimes my mom had to work and was tired so we didn't go. Other times I was just too lazy to get out of bed. While there are other times when I was invited to a friend's church. I know that I should go to church. I don't really want to anymore and I can't explain why. It doesn't have anything to do with any particular person. I just don't desire to go anymore. I'm kind of worried that maybe no one at my church will recognize the call that God has on my life. For so long, ever since I was little, I felt like I was invisible to everyone in the church. Even now, when I was going, I felt invisible. I am not sure if it's God trying to tell me that I am in the wrong place or if it's the devil trying to keep me out of church. I'm not totally sure about that. I wanted to tell my Pastor of my calling but I'm fearful of that. I don't want to have another disappointment. I don't want to be denied from doing the thing that God desires for me to do. Plus my pastor will probably assume I'll be unfaithful in my calling because I haven't been attending church on the regular. What should a woman of God do in a situation like this? For right now, I am going to spend more time with the Lord in praise and worship, prayer, fasting and studying the Word of God.

Sometimes I am fearful of the call that God has on my life. Lately I have been feeling like I have been getting persecuted daily. There have been times I have tried to reach out to someone but no one was there to be found. Intercessors, please I ask that you pray for me. Ask God to show me what it is that He desires for me to do now. Ask God where I need to go now. More importantly, I desire to live a Holy life that pleases God. The truth is, I have fallen short of God's glory and sinned against Him. At the same time, when I try to do good evil is present. I don't want to fall in the devil's traps. I know that Jesus Christ is sitting on the right hand of God praying for me. I desire for you all to pray that God removes everything out of me that's not like Him.

If you have a calling on your life, I have some questions for you to answer. What is God calling you to do? How did you know what God is calling you to do? What did you do after God told you what you were called to do? What type of fruit have you created in your calling? What did you do to prepare yourself for the calling? When did you first know you were called by God? Did you get some confirmation about your calling? Did your pastor recognize the calling upon your life? What did you do before you walked into your calling? What sacrifices did you have to make for your calling? How did you find out you were called? What is your ministry? Who is your ministry for? How did your ministry get started? Have your ministry expanded? What are the trials you had to go through in your ministry? Is your ministry your full time job? What is your niche in ministry? How does your ministry help the community?

Every person has a calling on their lives but not every person is called to preach. God has called many but few people are chosen. It is my understanding that the reason why a few people are chosen is because a few people answer to the calling that God has on their lives.

Matthew 22:14 says For many are called, but few are chosen.

Ephesians 4:11-12 And He gave some, apostles; and some prophets; and some evangelists; and some pastors and teachers; For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

A Wake Up Call: Don't Give Up

Hello everyone. How are you all doing? Good I hope. It's 11:46 p.m. and today is Monday 08/29/10. This past week, I have been dealing with some problems spiritually, mentally and emotionally. Friday, 08/26/10 my spirit was down because I felt like I was tired of not having a job, not having a car, not having my license, tired of being overweight and most of all, tired of feeling lonely and not having a husband. I was also tired of people making false promises to me. I thought about all the people who had promised me that they would do things for me and never came through. So I wrote a status on FB because I felt like giving up. As soon as I allowed depression to kick in that's when I started to develop this terrible headache. I felt such pain that I felt like I was about to die. I said a prayer and asked God to clean up my life and take me home. Sincerely in my heart that night I wanted to see Jesus but God didn't answer that prayer. That night I really had a desire to leave the earth. I wouldn't kill myself because I don't want to be separated from God and I don't want to go to hell. I want to always have a relationship with God. I sat there feeling that no one loved me, feeling that I was all alone. I couldn't call someone. I felt like I be there for everyone else but no one was there for me. I felt like I didn't have a support team to help me out. Then I heard the devil tell me things like you don't have any friends, no one loves you, you might as well just kill yourself. So that night I prayed and cried out to God because I really needed him to move on my behalf. As time went by, I shut my eyes and went to sleep.

The next day I felt a lot better. So I started searching for writing and Graphic Design jobs online. I did a few writing jobs and got paid for one of them. I've made up in my mind, that I let go of all the pain of the past. I forgive all those people who have not came through for me. If you hold on to the past you will pass up your blessings. I also remembered that it is best to pray for people and just leave them in God's hands. I've learned that I can't blame other people for my problems. Instead I have to praise God through the storm and allow him to solve the problems. The Bible says that God is our help in times of trouble. Jesus said let not your heart be troubled. Right now, I repent asking God to forgive me for allowing the devil to come in. I ask God to forgive me for doubting that He has a plan for my life.

A few days later, on a Sunday night. I listened to a video by this man of God on Facebook by the name of Pastor E L Jones Jr called Keys 2 Success. He said something that was very profound to me that stuck with me: When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe then you will be successful. I've learned that sometimes if you want to be successful then you have to give up sleep sometimes. If you go to sleep, might miss out on opportunities. I had a wake up call tonight. I realized that I have been sleeping on my dreams too much. It's time for me to move forward, putting forth the effort. Sometimes I am going to have to let go of the pleasures and fun just for the moment. I realized that I can't give up. I can't give up on the dreams that God has put on the inside of me.

I just want to let everyone know to wake up! Keep dreaming big, don't let anyone else stop you. Don't ever give up! If you keep trying, something good has to come out of your hard work. Keep pursuing your dreams even through the roughest times in your life. Trust that God has put greatness in you. Remember that you can do all things through Christ which strengthens you. Put God first, put forth the effort and everything will work out the way it is supposed to. If God can use Abraham and make Abraham a very successful man then God can do it for you as well. Remember that God is no respecter of persons. He has given you the power to get wealth and the wisdom to keep it. He has also given you the wisdom to create witty inventions. The gifts that God has put on the inside of you will make room for you and present you before great successful men and women. God will send anointed people to recognize your gift and help you to prosper. Have some faith and put some action with that faith because faith is dead without works. When the devil comes telling you that you can't make it, remember, that greater is He that's in you than he that's in the world. God is so much bigger than the devil. When the enemy comes in like a flood God will raise a standard against him. So trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. Acknowledge Him in all your ways and He shall direct your path. Trust God and trust in the ability that God has placed within you. This is a wake up call for you. You've been sleeping far too long. It's time for you to get up, make things happen, and remember don't give up!